The World As Best As I Can Remember It

Well, I just wrote what may be the introduction to my last paper of my first year in seminary. Perhaps it is too informal and will be deleted or perhaps it’ll be reworked, refined and will remain. At any rate, this is, in short, what I have been working 20 years to say:

 

Jacob he loved Rachel and Rachel she loved him
And Leah was just there for dramatic effect.    –Rich Mullins

The story of Leah and Rachel seized my imagination when, as a thirteen year old girl, I first heard Rich Mullins’ song “Jacob and 2 Women (The World As Best As I Can Remember It).” For the first time in my church saturated life, a story in the Bible felt deeply human and thus absolutely true. I read Genesis 29-30 repeatedly and kept wondering, what does it mean? As the song lyrics indicate, there is something in our church culture, and perhaps in the biblical text itself, that tends to read the beautiful Rachel as the star of the show and the one to be pitied, while the unloved Leah is seen simply as a pesky interruption or perhaps even a jealous woman of flawed character. Yet, for the next two decades it was Leah with whom I felt companionship and with whom I wept.

For most readers this story of two sisters does not make the list of most troubling passages in the Old Testament—there are too many other stories in which God appears sadistic and the chosen people behave horrifically—but this has always been the story that won’t let me go. As I spent time deeply immersed in the study of this text it finally became clear to me that all along this text has asked questions so close to my heart that I did not know how to articulate or honor them. Am I beautiful? Can I be loved? Where is God in my rejection and unfulfilled desire? The story of Leah and Rachel speaks to the heart of what it means to be a woman, what it means to be human. Its pathos and ambiguity tell the truth about our deepest needs to find love, purpose, and perhaps even the attention of the creator of the universe. It is through Leah and Rachel in all their sorrow, bitterness, rivalry, and hope, that God brings forth into the world the deeply flawed yet passionately chosen people of the covenant, the promised children of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, the agents of God’s blessing to the entire world.

Love to You

It is Valentine’s Day, and rather than falling into my typical curmudgeonly pattern I’d like to share with you a song that speaks to me of what love truly is.

I’ve made it all the way to our reading week  break and haven’t managed to write any blogs yet. There are many reasons for that, but now that I have a few days off I have a few things stirring. Perhaps a post or two is on the way, but for now I’m sending you this song that not only speaks truth but also gives you a window into what I’ve been learning to believe even more deeply this term.